Given more than you can handle?

Is God in the business of making mischief in the lives of his people?  I don’t think so, but I’ve heard what some people have to say and, as odd as it sounds, I can see where one could easily be led to that conclusion. I recall some of the melodramatic imagery in the old Edna Massimilla poem: “A meeting was held quite far from Earth. It’s time again for another birth…”  God and the angels are pictured in, apparently, a committee to determine which very special family will be a perfect fit for a child with a disability (Heaven’s Very Special Child).  No disrespect to Edna, but I’m not convinced.

One of our First Conversation writers, Erin Coss, has a more eloquent (if not more realistic and scripturally sound) take.  From page 60:

Then there was the oh so famous saying “The Lord will never give you more than you can handle.” People would quote this to me as though it was scripture. As though I had the personal strength to endure anything. But this was the farthest thing from the truth. What would be revealed to me was that nowhere in scripture is the saying “The Lord will never give you more than you can handle.” On the contrary, we will face many situations that are just unbelievably unbearable, but “I can do everything with the help of Christ who gives me the strength I need.” Philippians 4: 13 (NLT).

Last month, shortly before my daughter delivered her first child, she said to me, “Dad, I think we’re ready.”  I couldn’t help but smile.  “Oh, Sweetheart,” I assured her, “No, you’re not.”  I’m willing to suggest that all parents, regardless of what is revealed on the chromosome maps of their children, are absolutely ‘given more than they can handle’.  In fact, that seems to be a prominent theme that emerges from nearly every parent’s story in the book.   It’s more than we can handle. Yet, right there in the middle of it all, God chooses to reveal himself.  Peace beyond understanding.  Strength beyond reason.  Grace that amazes.  

Thanks for your insight, Erin.

David Morstad

I Am Viable

VIABLE. Capable of living; having the ability to grow, expand, develop; vivid; real.

Why is this significant? As you will be reminded at www.iamviable.com, pregnant women all over the world will be told today that the child they are carrying may not a “viable fetus.” As tragically necessary as clear medical communication (sometimes referred to as an “adverse prenatal diagnosis”) may be, it raises a variety of questions about what really constitutes viability.  As you will read when you visit the site, the issue reaches beyond simply living or dying.  In most cases, the ‘viability’ question is really put forth as a question of the value or quality-of-life potential of a child with a disability.  As in First Conversation, you will meet mothers, fathers, sisters and brothers who have faced real life struggles and provide honest personal reflections that confront the question with great clarity.

The site describes itself in this way:

It is our desire to share with you through this website, stories of hope, stories of how God uses every life to display his character, for within each and every one of us, God has created the capacity for a relationship with him. God also gives us the ability to touch others around us and it is sometimes through those least expected, that God can touch us in the most profound of ways.

More than just a collection of stories, the site also provides the opportunity view a few interesting videos. One in particular may be of interest, especially given the comments on the previous post. “Welcome to Holland”, a poem written and performed by a father, provides a wonderful parental perspective that seems to put the issue of grief in its proper place.

Thank you to Kara, founder and editor of I Am Viable, for this important resource.

David Morstad

A Prayer for Healing

Today I read an article by a mother whose child was recently diagnosed with autism.  In it she wrote, “I pray for a miracle every day.”  While she gives no explanation, we’re left to assume she means a significant change in her son.

I’ve heard an awful lot of people with developmental disabilities pray.  I’ve heard them pray for health, for safety of their mom and dad, for food and friends.  I’ve heard a lot of prayers for forgiveness, and I can even remember one really great petition for a new pair of shoes.  Yet, I don’t remember a single prayer for a higher IQ, or for new and improved genetics.  Why do you suppose that is?  I think it hints that a new paradigm of what does and does not need healing might be in order. 

Is healing needed?  You bet. Consider for a moment all those things related to disability which are indeed tragic – discrimination, inadequate education, poverty, limited health care, reduced independence, social isolation.  All of those things need healing – not just in the lives of people with disabilities, but in our lives as well.  They all put barriers between us and people with disabilities and we want those barriers destroyed.  So did Jesus. 

When Jesus healed people, he put them back with society.  Of course, it would have been nice if all ten lepers had stopped by to say ‘thank you’, but I have a hunch that nine of them were just too anxious to get out there and live life with their family and friends.  After all, Jesus had put them back together.

God knows the difference between those things that make us unique as individuals (like this syndrome or that syndrome) and those things in the world that are truly in need of healing.   He knows that the real barrier is the gulf that sin puts between people, regardless of their abilities. And that is the real healing he stepped forward to accomplish in our lives.

Today, may God heal that which needs healing.

David Morstad